Saturday, September 30, 2017

Are Goths Depressed?

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Yes and no. Depression is not a requirement for being goth, as being goth isn't a requirement for being depressed. We all know someone who's been depressed. You don't? Well you do, cause depression is an invisible illness. That's why seeing someone in black doesn't mean they're depressed! This is not the victorian age, where someone in black means that they have recently lost a loved one. You can't tell by someone's appearance what they feel, what their story is, what they've experienced and what illness they have.

Goths are the happiest, bubbliest, friendliest, most positive people I know! I'm sure most people who know one can agree with that. BUT as goths do, we acknowledge that not everything in the world is wonderful all of the time. We like darkness, mystery, history - even death (not that we wanna die. we go to picnics in the graveyard for the peaceful, beautiful and historical environment.)! We are romantic and dramatic people, maybe even slightly old-fashioned, and we see beauty where others don't.

Now, a lot of teenagers nowadays romanticize depression and other mental health issues, whether they call themselves goth or not. That is wrong, even though it's a good thing that people talk about it - cause it needs to! It's not ''cool'' to be depressed. It's terrible! It doesn't make you more attractive to others, people aren't going to come rushing over to fix your broken heart.
I'm not saying that ALL teenagers who claim to be mentally ill are just looking for attention, but I have often seen it, and especially online and in goth related groups. Many really do think that to be a goth you have to be depressed, wear all black, worship the devil and be violent.
Another thing that happens to a lot of teens, especially alternative kids, is that they get bullied for being different. Now THIS CAN contribute to developing depression, as well as pressure / restricting of freedom from parents, lack of proper friends, not doing well in school, etc. There are also more serious things that can happen to someone at a young age which can lead to depression or other mental illness. This is why it is important to seek help as soon as possible. It's hard, but just one word to anyone is the first step on the road to recovery. Be kind to yourself and strong, and you will make it through. Just remember that often, you can't do it alone.

Most adults still find it taboo to talk about these issues. Probably cause we grew up without anyone talking about it, it was all hidden away from us. It was and still kind of is shameful to have mental illness. Even post-partum depression isn't talked about as much, something that's so common! But no, you should be ASHAMED of yourself to DARE to be sad when you have ''so much to be happy about''. This is really harmful to the ones who suffer from it, cause they will feel like they are crazy, and be afraid to talk to someone and get help.

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I have suffered myself from depression on-and-off since I was 13. That's 10 years, and about half of it has been spent suffering from it. Yes I am confirming the awful ''stereotype'', but I am not ashamed. Mental illness happens to anyone! I'm not going to hide that fact just because we don't want people to think that goths aren't depressed. Goths can be satanists too (not to be confused with actual devil-worship, people)! Sometimes two things cross. Goth culture is huge, and it's impossible to say that ''goths aren't this or that'' - cause it isn't true. Goths can like to knit, Hello Kitty, sports, anything! Just like regular people. It's weird that a lot of people think that ''just because you like this, you can't like that''. Why do we think this way?

Yes, you can be a goth and depressed - it doesn't have anything to do with each other. You don't listen to ''Bela Lugosi's Dead'' and instantly start having anxiety and depression. I started suffering from depression before I discovered goth music. No, I didn't become one because I was depressed either. My psychologists didn't give me black clothing and cds when I got treated! Though that would have made me really happy! You see, our interests make us happy. I am happy when I get elaborately dressed up, dance to good music or read a nice book. A sign of a depressed goth is most likely them NOT dressing goth anymore, NOT listening to music, NOT reading, NOT creating art. Cause when you suffer from depression and anxiety, it is crippling. You can barely get out of bed, you don't want to do the things you like anymore. You're not anything anymore. THAT is what depression does to you. If a goth is depressed, you wouldn't even see them! If you did, you probably wouldn't recognize them.

I'm going to round this off now, as it is very lengthy and you probably have gotten the point by now. So in conclusion: Goths CAN be depressed, just like any other people. We are not immune to illnesses! We are just people after all, and anyone can get depressed! Don't assume anything about anyone. Also, if you know someone who is depressed or you are yourself, please talk to someone and get help. You do not deserve to feel this way! I know how you feel, and you'd be surprised that others you know might know too! If someone speaks up, others will. I hope that some day this won't be such a shameful thing to talk about.

I recommend checking out this video by Simon / CoalCandy! He has an awesome youtube channel.

Friday, September 29, 2017

Deep Calleth Upon Deep - Satyricon Review

The album cover is Edvard Munch's ''Dødskyss'' (Death's Kiss) from 1899. Pretty cool!
The rest of the casing and booklet is really boring though, so I'm only providing you with the cover.

Midnight Serpent
The album starts off with the typical Satyricon sound. Also the same type of ''short'' lyrics. Nothing new here, and not a good way to start the album in my opinion. The speaking part is a little different, so that's something, at least! I like the guitar in that part.

Blood Cracks Open The Ground
This one's a little better, a little different. It has a more progressive sound. I like the guitar melody in this. The lyrics could have been better (i.e. longer).

To Your Brethren In The Dark
This is a slower track. The emphasis on the (many) times he sings the title is kind of funny. I find these lyrics a little better than the previous two tracks. I get a proper black metal atmosphere from the guitars. Good drums too. The track drags a little on though.

Deep Calleth Upon Deep
Ok, the title track. Kind of tacky lyrics, but I guess it could be worse. Interesting operatic vocals. There's some string instruments in the background too, I would have liked them to be a little bit more forward in the mix - probably the operatic vocals too. That would probably have made the track more ''grand'', and fitting to bear the album title.

The Ghost Of Rome
The guitars are very.. high-pitched in this one. A little different. Not bad lyrics! This one also has operatic vocals, more prominent, which is very fitting to the song. Good ending.

Dissonant
Very interesting instruments in this one! Is it called brass instruments in english? A very funky song. Again, the lyrics could have been better, but they aren't the worst. Satyr just doesn't express himself in many words, haha. Some really good drums in this one. Overall, a pretty good song instrumentally! I think this is my favorite song on the album so far, since it's so unique.

Black Wings And Withering Gloom
Not bad lyrics on this one! This is the longest song on the album, so like the other long one, it drags on quite a bit. But towards the end we get some male operatic vocals and some strings, which saves it a little.

Burial Rite
Ok, last song! It's not really impressing me. I'm not sure if it could have been better if it was mixed differently. I don't really care for the lyrics. Kind of honestly glad that it's over.

Me and Sandra listened to this the first time together, and we were a little disappointed. It was kind of boring! We aren't exactly blood fans of Satyricon, but we did expect more. I liked the last album much better! We are hoping they won't play many songs from this album at the show here in Bergen on november 29th - but they probably will. Oh well, we get in for free anyway. I had a look at their merch though, they had a lot of nice stuff! So I will probably shop quite a bit at the show.

So this isn't a very long album, about 45 minutes, I think? It wasn't that expensive though, so I don't really feel bummed about buying it when I didn't enjoy it that much. If you are a fan of Satyricon, I think it's worth checking out - and I do believe in supporting artists. Just maybe not get that massive wooden box set that's super expensive.

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

A Very Norwegian Weekend

Hello, hello, hello! I hope you all had a nice weekend. I thought I'd do a personal post and tell you about mine!
Lace blazer - Thrifted
Tunic - Wow
Skirt - Thrifted
Victorian boots - Funtasma

I went to the city center to meet my sister. We went to the thrift store, and found some cool stuff! I had one excellent find, a dress that was super tight on me - with fringes! I usually think it's a little silly, but this time I just had to have it. I feel like a mixture of Shagrath and Morticia Addams.

Afterwards we went to the store called Husfliden - That's the main store for the bunad, the norwegian national costume. I brought in the one I inherited from my grandmother, to see if they could tell me anything about it - They couldn't, sadly.
We then went and met our parents, who mentioned they were going out to the island where my father grew up the next day, so I decided to join them. I had planned to talk to a woman there about taking the dress in for me, and since I was already carrying it, why not!
That evening while my dad was watching tv, Satyricon suddenly showed up! Which reminded me that I forgotten to go to the record store earlier. Their new album is out, and they are embarking on tour! I will be seeing them right here in a couple of months! They played at the same venue four years ago when their last (last?) album came out, and it was incredible! So I can't wait.


So on sunday morning we took the ferry boat to what we now use as a summer house. The woman I mentioned earlier came, put the bunad on me, stuck needles in it, and immediately made it fit! So she took it with her to sew it. I can't wait! The vest part of it was way too big for me, that's why I haven't posted a photo of me in it yet. I would love to do a photoshoot in it when everything is ready! So if a local photographer is reading this and is interested in doing a classic norwegian photoshoot, hit me up!
After some classic norwegian heart-shaped waffles we went to the boat house to fish. I grew up fishing a lot, so I love it! Bet you didn't know that about me! Now that I go with my family to the summer house as an adult, I always manage to have the funniest fishing outfits, as you can see:

Derpy fishing face

I immediately caught a tiny cod!
Another weird fact: I'm allergic to them.
Yet another one: I apparently like to catch fishes in the eye.

When we got back to the house, my sister and I decided to up in the attic and see if we could possibly find the pieces that are missing from my grandmother's bunad. We didn't, but we found a 50's sailor type bikini top, as well as a corset! I suspect that my grandmother was a very fashionable woman back in the day. 

Before we took the ferry home, we visited my dad's cousin. We watched the final minutes of the UCI 2017 Road World Championships, which happened to take place right here in my own town (the traffic's been a nightmare). Norway was a few milliseconds away from gold! Not bad at all.
The last things I did before going home was buy a bunad shirt on.. I guess I'll call it norwegian craigslist, and visit a woman I found on the same site who conveniently lived close to my parents, who was selling a bunad breast cloth that she made. So now I have that! I just need to get an apron sorted now, then my bunad is complete! My aunt reminded me today that I need shoes (in my case bunad BOOTS), but let's wait until I can justify spending 230$ on that. Bunads are expensive!

Then I went home to Simen. I went to bed semi early, but he stayed up since he had a couple of friends over to watch wrestling. And that was the end of my weekend! I ended up doing a lot more than planned, but I'm really happy that things are coming along with my bunad! Looks like I will be able to wear it on the next national day (may 17th)!

I guess that was an insight to norwegian culture, haha. Hope I didn't bore you! My next post will be a review on Satyricon's new album. Simen has ordered Voltaire's new album, so I'll be reviewing that too, pretty soon! The Cure can wait, lol. Until next time, take care!

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Pretty Girl Thirteen by Liz Coley Review

I have had this on my to read shelf on GoodReads for years, and I finally decided to get some books off of the old end! This was one of them. And oh my GOD, I'm so glad I did! This book was... crazy.

I only knew that the book was about a 13 year old girl who comes home - and her parents tell her that she's been missing for three years. But it gets more mysterious than that! I checked when I told my coworker about the book (who is now going to read it too), it's not a spoiler: She has developed dissociative identity disorder because of the trauma she has experienced. I find that really fascinating! I've seen some crime shows where characters have had it, and found it really exciting.

I finished the book in less than 24 hours (a day which included sleep and work - but I have to admit, I did read a little at work), I had such a hard time putting it down! The main character Angie discovering her personalities and what happened to her, while trying to adjust to being 16 and going back to normal life.

I thought that this was just a regular YA book, and I have mostly outgrown that type of books, but this didn't contain a lot of.. ''teenage-ness''. But this was a psychological mystery! So I really loved it. But I wouldn't recommend it for young teens - this book is not for the fainthearted. If you like crime shows / novels, plus psychological stuff, this is definitely something you need to read!

Click here to get the book!

Thursday, September 21, 2017

The Phantom Of The Opera By Gaston Leroux + 1925 Silent Film Review

I finally got myself a copy of this classic! I've never read it nor seen a movie or musical, so here are my first thoughts!

It starts off with a bang, pretty much. We jump right into the horror and mystery of the opera ghost. The new managers of the opera don't believe in him, but they will of course experience that he's real.

I was surprised that most of the novel is about Raoul and his love for Christine. I would rather have liked it if we saw more of the phantom, but I guess it's "scarier" if we don't get to see him as much.

It is a very exciting novel, it keeps the same pace all the way, though I would have wished for the story arc to rise a little more towards the end - but it wasn't bad.

At the end I kind of feel sorry for the phantom, I'm not sure if one is supposed to, or it's just me that's obsessed with villains.

Also, the novel really makes me want to visit the opera house in Paris!

My copy is a nice clothbound type book with black and red brocade, and a stretchy band to keep it shut - Which was very useful when carrying it around in my bag! One downside is that in some chapters at the end of the book, there are footnotes missing. But other than that is a really nice edition, and they have other classics in the series I might get too!
Click here to buy a copy for yourself!

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I decided to finally see the 1925 silent film as well - I think we all know the classic face of the phantom in that movie, but I have actually never seen it. It was easily found on youtube. I don't really like watching movies, cause I just can't sit and watch something for the duration of a movie (and movies nowadays just keep getting longer and longer!). I HAVE to do something at the same time - Usually I look up fun facts about the movie. With silent films, you obviously have to be glued to the screen more than you usually would. I still played games on my phone, haha. But I think I managed to catch every screen of text!

Anyway, it was a beautiful movie. The actors and sets looked amazing. For the time, it was really great! I do enjoy the fun music of silent films. The acting was super overdone, but I guess they had to do that. There were some variations from the book, but it wasn't too bad - The only thing I didn't quite like was that they made the phantom some criminally insane dude who had escaped from the island from criminally insane he was confined on. Oh, haven't we heard that one before (though maybe at the time this was a new thing?). That and he was killed by the classic angry mob. I kind of wanted to roll my eyes at that. But I guess it's me again wanting to sympathize with the villain.

If you're a fan of gothic and / or classic horror films, this is definitely a must-see! I can say the same thing for the novel - It was a pretty easy read. I want to see a version of the musical, so if anyone has any tips on a good one, let me know!

And since I am the metalhead that I am, I will leave you with the song that's been stuck in my head these few days I've been reading the book; Iron Maiden's Phantom of the Opera. A classic masterpiece, just like its namesake!

Monday, September 18, 2017

Little Women By Louisa May Alcott Review

Lazily copied from my GoodReads:

Ahh, I haven't read a victorian book in a while, so this was really refreshing! I just love the language and how things were back then.

This is about four sisters, who each have their own ''flaws'' that they need to work on. Some are kind of annoying, some aren't that bad. This book follows them over the course of a year, starting with a christmas where their father is away at war, and they are complaining about being poor.

I won't go too much in on what happens, but to me, it seemed like this book had no plot at all. I felt it didn't have a story arc. It seemed mostly like a ''slice of life'' type of book. It's not THAT well written either. As a modern woman, I found some things in the book anti-feminist, but when I think about it, this book might have been considered pretty feminist at the time.

I think this book is best suited for young girls, especially if they struggle with the same things as the girls in the book. Personally the only enjoyment I got of it was only because it's a classic victorian book, which I love. So if you're into that too, it's worth a shot!

This edition also contains a little dictionary in the back, which can be quite useful for those who are getting into victorian literature! It's very fascinating to see how some words have changed definitions from then to now - and sometimes it makes me giggle while reading!


Click the photo to buy the book!

BONUS! I decided to watch the 1994 movie, cause it had some interesting actors; Winona Ryder, Kirsten Dunst, Trini Alvarado, Claire Danes, Susan Sarandon, and... Christian Bale. Simen said he couldn't imagine him as anyone else but Batman, and then I said; ''Well, let's see how he does as the boy next door!'' Then I remembered... His character's parents are dead, and he lives with his rich grandfather. This is the victorian Batman, haha!

The contents of this book only takes up the first hour of the movie - I assume the rest tells what happens in the later books. I definitely didn't expect the turn of events for all of the characters, so with that, the costumes and the scenery it was pretty okay. It's probably better suited for those who are into romance - I think it would be a nice holiday movie too.

I'm currently reading The Phantom Of The Opera, so I'll definitely review that (and probably the classic movie too) next time!

Saturday, September 16, 2017

My Grandmother's Hardangerbunad

When Sandra was over last night, I decided to take some pictures of my grandmother's bunad, which I recently inherited. A bunad is Norway's national costume, and this one is from Hardanger. Every place has it's own design, and they are based on what the commoners wore in the 1800s. Today most girls get one at their confirmation (at 15). This particular one is shorter than it should be, cause the length fits me (who's 146 cm), but was short on my ca. 170 cm tall grandmother. There are other odd things about it too, so I posted these pictures in a facebook group, and a lady told me some interesting things about it! I'll put what she said about the pieces under the photos.


The design with the points on the chest is might be what they call a ''salmebok-sne'', and hails from Sørfjorden.


This looks like an angel- or smith-buckle.

The five small brooches look like hair clips, she got some from her great great grandmother, who was young in the 1820s. She has used them as clips on little girls (before the confirmation bunad).
The big brooch might be more than 200 years old! That really shocked me.

 For some reason the throat buttons don't match

Here's what it should look like complete!



Here are my grandparents on their wedding day.
I don't think this is the same bunad though.
And my grandfather looks like Dracula!

Gorgeous! (I'm listening to the GLJ song right now, haha)

So I'm going to need to take in the vest to fit me, and get a shirt, apron and breast cloth. Probably some bunad boots too. I think I'm pretty all set when it comes to all the silver. I'm not used to bling!
Hopefully I can get it ready by our next national day (may 17th), but we'll see. Regardless, I definitely want to be old-fashioned and use this for other special occasions! Most norwegians only use it for the national day, but a generation or two back use it for all bigger special occasions. I've even heard some use it for yule! Maybe I should do that. I will at least be super proud to wear it! I unfortunately never got to meet my grandmother, so it is an honor that I now have this after her.

In other news... There aren't any. I've just been working all week. On my free time I just watch TV and read (I'm currently reading Little Women). Right now I'm just chilling on the couch listening to Spotify's song radio of Burn by The Cure - So far a very good playlist, I really recommend it!
Lace blazer - Thrifted
Lace blouse - EMP
Pencil skirt - Necessary Evil

Saturday, September 9, 2017

We've Moved!

Hey! I've been gone for over a week now, so I thought I had to put up an update to what's going on! As you might know already, me and Simen moved to a new apartment last weekend. So we've been putting together furniture, finding places for our belongings and decorationg the place. I've also been working every day this week (and Simen is still on sickleave), so things have been slower.

First step of putting together our new bed!

The finished bed - So happy!

We also got Simen a new pretty desk for half off!

Some decoration around the TV - not that it really needed it.
Look at that gorgeous wallpaper behind it and on the ceiling!

I'm not sure if I have even mentioned that I work in a bookstore now! This past month has been so hectic (plus I've been battling a mysterious disease that didn't turn out to be a flu virus OR epstein barr). I got a bunch of ''first read'' books at work! So happy. My to read pile is so huge right now, it's over twice as big as this pile. So I've been spending a lot of my free time reading, which is pretty nice. Nowadays I just want to relax and get settled in our new home since things have been so busy lately.

Shirt - Historical Emporium
Necklace - The Pumpkin Coven
Underbust - Xtrax (now EMP)
Apron - Ebay
Bustle skirt - Retroscope Fashions
Stockings - Walmart around Halloween

I'll definitely show you an apartment tour when we've finished decorating and settled in properly! We still have stuff to put on the walls and some decorations to find homes for. But furnishing-wise we're good! We plan to stay here until we buy a place.
When I find the time I will put up some more album reviews (I'm doing The Cure next, so any requests are welcome, since I'm definitely not gonna do them all), and probably some book reviews. If you have any other suggestions, let me know! Until next time, take care!

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